Christmas Eve Eve

From Christmas Eve Eve 2015

For as long as I can remember, my mother has referred to today (12/23) as Christmas Eve Eve, and at some point we developed a tradition of driving around to look at Christmas lights while drinking hot chocolate and listening to Christmas music. We've made a few modifications from time to time--some years we wear pajamas, other years we wear Christmas sweaters; some years we buy the hot chocolate at Starbucks, other years we make Hershey's cocoa at home with special marshmallows from Whole Foods--but we ALWAYS drive around and look at lights on Christmas Eve Eve. No matter how difficult or wonderful a year we've had, no matter what losses, anxiety, or joy we're carrying around, we look at Christmas lights and listen to songs of hope found in unlikely places and families gathering from near and far to celebrate and hold each other close.

Though the tradition originated with my mother, it extends far beyond her. Tonight I will observe Christmas Eve Eve with my brother, two sisters, one sister's boyfriend, and my father and step-mother. We'll drive around in my father's new minivan (do not ask me why a 64-year-old man would buy himself a minivan; we just accept my father's quirks and marvel at how little it takes to make him happy), and my brother will guide us to neighborhoods that none of us knew existed, neighborhoods he discovered during his years as a landman in the early days of horizontal drilling in the Barnett Shale. There will be a lot of personalities in close proximity in that minivan, so my siblings and I are adding an element to the tradition: a closing beer/drink at a nearby bar. Our parents will drop us off at the end of the Christmas light expedition, and we'll walk home together under a dark, starry sky, grateful and relaxed in the last few moments before the chaos really sets in.

I hope all of you are looking forward to favorite traditions over the next few days, and I hope the light and life of the season find their way to you, no matter what kind of year you've had/are having. If you find a few minutes to sneak away and write, here are the prompts (two weeks' worth) from 642 Things:

1. Your family pet starts talking to you. What exactly does he or she think is going on around here?

2. You knew they were lying. You chose to pretend you believed them. (Santa might provide a lot of material for this particular prompt!)

3. What's one way you might become eccentric in your old age? How might you go in another (but equally batty) direction?

4. How did the way your parents felt about their bodies or physicality affect you and how you feel about your body and physicality?

5. What was your favorite trip as a child, and why?

6. What is the object that belonged to your parent that you associate most strongly with him or her, and why?

Advent: Week Two

Arthur Ave Market; Bronx, NY

Here are the 642 Things prompts for this week:

• Who was the hardest person in your life to forgive? How did you do it?

• Finish this sentence and keep writing for 10 minutes. DO NOT LOOK AHEAD

What I most want you to know about me is . . .

• Stop after 10 minutes. Now write this and keep going for 10 minutes:

That was all a lie. Here's what I really want you to know . . .

• Your high school reunion is coming up. Think of one person you really don't want to see there. Write a letter to that person about what happened back in high school, and how it makes you feel, even today, this many years later.

Be sure to post responses in the comments! Go back to last week's post to see Sue's example.

Advent/December Posts

Hello everyone!

I hope you are all settling back into work and your regular routine after the Thanksgiving holiday. Posting these writing prompts took a backseat (quite literally--my computer stayed stowed in the backseat of my car for the better part of six days) to my family's road trip to Lubbock and Abilene for Thanksgiving.

My mom convinced my brother and me (and my two younger kids) to spend part of Thanksgiving weekend in a yurt. We didn't completely hate it, though I probably won't be doing it again any time soon.

But now we're back, and it's off to the races: for many of us, these next few weeks will be some of the busiest of the entire year. In order to keep up with the prompts as well as other responsibilities, I'm going to post once a week on Tuesdays. Each post will include three prompts from 642 Things. I encourage you to write a response to one or more and post them in the comments.

Our time together on Wednesday nights will still include discussion of a selection from Mary Karr or Anne Lamott, but I'd like to spend more time on writing and sharing. If you haven't joined us for a class yet, please come! I have so enjoyed getting to know each other better through our responses to the readings and in-class writing prompts.

Here are the prompts from 642 Things for this week:

• What piece of jewelry do you wear most often? Write about why it's your go-to-piece of jewelry. Where did you get it? What do you like about the way it looks on you? Why does it feel good to wear?

• Write about a good-bye that you didn't know was a last good-bye.

• Write about the morning you least wanted to get out of bed.

Imaginary Friends

This ought to be a fun one!

I had an active, vivid imagination, but I don't remember any imaginary friends. I'll have to ask my mom when we're together over the holidays.

Today's prompt from 642 Things: Write about the imaginary friend you had, never had, or wish you'd had.

Voice Variations

My grandmother hated the way her voice sounded on answering machines. She left stiff, awkward messages that exaggerated her West Texas accent, and she always complained bitterly when you called her back: "I just can't stand those things; they make me sound so different!" I never told her that I didn't think they distorted her voice at all. Sometimes grandchildren know when it's best to keep their mouths shut.

Right before she died in 2015, she asked my uncle to make sure I gave one of the eulogies at her funeral, and I was both touched and intimidated by her request. Public speaking isn't my favorite thing to do, but I never could say no to her. I couldn't bring myself to put pen to paper right away; I procrastinated until my father found me hiding in the Pastor's Room at the funeral home a few minutes before the service, frantically scribbling bullet points on a notecard. I knew I would never remember what actually came out of my mouth, so when I walked up to the podium, I brought my iPhone and used the Voice Memo app to record the whole thing.

Lesson 1: bullet points do not make for the most polished presentation, but they get the job done;

Lesson 2: I don't mind the sound of my voice.

Maybe it was because I remembered how much she hated recordings of her voice, or maybe it was a distraction from cringing when I heard myself go down rabbit trails in my talk, but I noticed my voice--perhaps for the first time--as I listened to the recording. Once you notice your voice, you can't un-notice it, so I've been paying attention ever since.

My voice suits me. It isn't too high or too low. The pitch goes up with a slight squeak when I'm excited and down to a low growl when I'm really angry. The tone stays pretty even most of the time, but my children, my dog, and students in my classes all know when it's time to pay attention. My voice can soothe hurt feelings and de-escalate conflict; it can celebrate and mourn; it can convey enough authority for people to write down things I say. These days it sounds more relaxed and pleasant than agitated or sarcastic. I hear in my voice a woman becoming more comfortable in her own skin.

And if it doesn't sound that way on answering machines (or voicemail)? Just don't tell me. I'd rather not know.

. . . . . . .

Reflection for today: "The human voice is the organ of the soul."--Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Today's prompt from 642 Things: Write about your voice. Do you think it suits you? Would you change it if you could? How has it changed over the years?

Unplug

I'm posting this from the spot where I always sit on my father's couch. It's the one place the cats don't like to lounge, so it spares my allergies a bit. I look up once in awhile to watch one of my children hunting pecans in the backyard and the other playing checkers with my dad, and the sound of college football drifts into the living room from the bedroom where my stepmother is watching the Longhorns. Grandfather's house means turning off the phone (not just putting it on silent), slowing way down, and lots of "favorites"--favorite burgers for lunch, favorite Mexican restaurant for dinner, favorite movies to watch. As my daughter brushed her teeth this morning, she sighed, "I love coming here." Me, too, sweet girl. Me, too.

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Leaving was a spur-of-the-moment decision, so I accidentally left 642 Things at home. This prompt is from me:

Where do you go when you need a break? Is it a place or a person or both? What does unplugging look, feel, taste, sound, and smell like for you? How often do you do it?

Accidents Happen

I had about a thousand errands to run the day we came back from the parish retreat at Camp Allen and a tight schedule to keep because of my son's baseball game. So rear-ending the car in front of me on Westheimer at River Oaks Boulevard was not my idea of a good time. It was totally my fault; my daughter distracted me from the backseat, and when I turned back to face the road, the car in front of me had come to a complete stop waiting to make a left turn. I can't think of many sounds worse than squealing brakes followed by a resonant thud. And then the feeling in your stomach in that split second before you climb out of the car, repeating over and over, "Please don't let it be that bad. Please don't let it be that bad. Please don't let it . . . oh, man."

I picked up my car from the body shop yesterday afternoon, so I had to laugh a little when this turned out to be the prompt for today from 642 Things:

Describe an accident you've been in. Were you at fault? Who was? What excuses were made? What were the lasting consequences?

Use this quote for reflection as you gather your thoughts:

"Decisions can be like car accidents, sudden and full of consequences."--Allison Glock

In Dreams

This one might be tough if you don't typically remember your dreams. If that's the case for you, maybe write about a dream you wish you could have.

Here's the quote for reflection. Have you ever tried to influence your dreams like this? Did it work?

My dad would tell me bedtime stories, and he used to always leave them open-ended and finish at a crucial point with the words, 'dream on'. Then it was my responsibility to finish the story as I was drifting off to sleep. We would call them dreaming stories. Hannah Kent

Today's prompt from 642 Things:

You can choose any previous dream to dream again tonight. Which one do you pick, and why?

Believing my Father

If you've never heard of Brian Andreas and Storypeople, do yourself a favor and go check out his work. Funny, poignant, whimsical--I give these to people I love all the time.

I gave this one to my dad for Father's Day about ten years ago. My father makes things up ALL THE TIME, and he can be really convincing. He claims I'm just gullible; I think the truth is both/and.

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Take a minute and reflect on the adults in your life who made things up or bent the truth here and there to avoid sticky topics or awkward conversations.

Now write a response to today's prompt from 642 Things:

Write about the first time you realized that adults weren't always totally truthful.

"And I mean to be one too."

Today is All Saints' Day, when we remember those who came before us in faith and left behind examples of character and courage as models for our own lives. Their stories are all different, but one quality they all shared was a willingness to risk everything--wealth, reputation, and life itself--to follow Jesus.

Today's reflection is a recording of one of my favorite chapel songs from elementary school. I'm sure you'll recognize it:


And here's today's prompt from 642 Things:

What's the biggest leap of faith you've taken?

Happy writing!

Retrospect

Good morning and happy weekend! I hope you all have something fun ahead of you today.

Here's the quote for reflection as you prepare to write:

        Naturally—and why should I not admit this—I have occasionally wondered to myself how things might have turned out in the long run.... I only speculate this now because in the light of subsequent events, it could well be argued that in making my decision...I was perhaps not entirely aware of the full implications of what I was doing. Indeed, it might even be said that this small decision of mine constituted something of a key turning point; that that decision set things on an inevitable course towards what eventually happened.

But then, I suppose, when with the benefit of hindsight one begins to search one's past for such 'turning points', one is apt to start seeing them everywhere.... What would have transpired, one may ask, had one responded slightly differently...? And perhaps—occurring as it did around the same time as these events?

Kazuo Ishiguro, The Remains of the Day

And here's the prompt from 642 Things:

Using the following template as a jumping-off point, write about a lesson you learned or an insight you gained. At the time, I felt/thought/acted ________. Now I see/understand/admit that ___________.

Happy writing!

Cool

When I went running yesterday, the sign in my neighborhood said it was 89 degrees. I can assure you I felt every single one of those degrees during my loop around Rice!

Almost exactly 24 hours later, I caught snowflakes on my tongue and watched my breath curl through the air in front of me while walking to my rental car in Hartford. New England can be a magical place in the fall.

Today's quote for reflection and prompt are about an entirely different kind of "cool," though--the kind I sort of left by the wayside when I saw the layer of white through the plane window.

(I bounced up and down in my seat and might or might not have actually squealed in delight.)

Today's quote is from one of my all-time favorite movies, Almost Famous, which was written and directed by Cameron Crowe:

The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what you share with someone else when you're uncool.

The prompt from 642 Things is:

What year was your year of maximum coolness?

If you'd like, you can flip it: what year were you most UNcool? (In my case, a certain haircut that made me resemble a poodle comes to mind...)

Happy writing!

On Natural Disasters

Hello everyone! I hope the week is off to a good start for you.

I missed posting on Saturday because we were at Camp Allen for the parish retreat (along with some of you!), but I will get back to our regular schedule of Tu/Thurs/Sat posts this week.

Here's the quote for reflection:

My architectural drive was to design new types of buildings to help poor people, especially following natural disasters and catastrophes... I will use whatever time is left to me to keep doing what I have been doing, which is to help humanity. Frei Otto

And here's what we have from 642 Things:

Write about the natural disaster experience you had, never had, and/or wish you'd had.

To throw in another way of sharing, feel free to post pictures of any natural disasters you've encountered. Here are a couple of mine:

This was the scene in my driveway in Connecticut after Hurricane Irene.

This was the neighborhood Christmas tree after being destroyed by Hurricane Sandy.

Pondering Power

It's Almost-Friday again!

Here's the quote for reflection for today:

“Power isn’t control at all — power is strength, and giving that strength to others. A leader isn’t someone who forces others to make him stronger; a leader is someone willing to give his strength to others that they may have the strength to stand on their own.” ― Beth Revis, Across the Universe

And the prompt from 642 Things:

What's the biggest position of power you've ever held? How did it change you?

I'll be posting several responses to this and previous prompts later this evening. I hope you'll add yours as well.

Happy writing!

Quote and Prompt--October 18

We will not meet tomorrow during Great Wednesdays because I have to be at my son's school for an evening activity. We will pick up with Anne Lamott's "Shitty First Drafts" on October 26.

Today's quote to help you focus before you start writing is something I saved in my phone a few years ago. I have no idea what the original source information might be, so I apologize for the lack of attribution:

Here's today's prompt from 642 Things:

Picture a photo from your childhood, one that you know well. Narrate the scene around the taking of that photo, to the best of your memory.

Remember to post your responses in the Comments, and happy writing!

Saturday Poem and Prompt

Good morning, writers!

Today is such a gorgeous day. Read this poem before you go out an enjoy it; then read it again when you come back inside.

The little cares that fretted me.

I lost them yesterday

Among the fields above the sea.

Among the winds at play;

Among the lowing of the herds,

The rustling of the trees,

Among the singing of the birds,

The humming of the bees.

The foolish fears of what may happen,

I cast them all away

Among the clover-scented grass,

Among the new-mown hay;

Among the husking of the corn

Where drowsy poppies nod,

Where ill thoughts die and good are born,

Out in the fields with God.

--Elizabeth Barrett Browning

(taken from page 370 of Life Prayers from Around the World, edited by Elizabeth Roberts and Elias Amidon)

Today's prompt from 642 Things:

Write a letter to the teacher (or coach) who made a difference in your life, asking him or her for help. What are you asking for? Why?

Starting Things Off

Welcome to the Palmer Writes blog!

This can be our online gathering place to encourage one another, share work, and build community--one word at a time.

A couple of disclaimers:

• I want to keep the security settings minimal in order to share this link easily, so please use reasonable caution in any personal information you post.

• Comments will be open, and I encourage everyone to post constructive comments often! I do reserve the right to delete anything that doesn't contribute to the positive environment we want to cultivate, but I will always get at least one other person's opinion (probably Roger's) before I take something down.

I'm putting this together in a hurry this morning, so don't be surprised to see some changes to the look and organization of the page over the next few weeks. If anyone has a burning desire to help edit the page, please let me know--I'd love to share responsibilities!

New posts will go up every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday with a short quote or mindfulness exercise to help you center yourself as you start work and a prompt from 642 Things to Write about Me (check out the whole series--I know what's going on my Christmas list!) or other resources as noted.

Today's mindfulness exercise is from Jon Kabat-Zinn's Wherever You Go, There You Are (p. 147):

TRY: Bringing awareness to walking, wherever you find yourself. Slow it down a bit. Center yourself in your body and in the present moment. Appreciate the fact that you are able to walk, which many people cannot. Perceive how miraculous it is, and for a moment, don't take for granted that your body works so wonderfully. . . . Walk with dignity and confidence, and as the Navaho saying goes, walk in beauty, wherever you are.

So go for a walk, and then write 250-500 words on the following:

Describe "the dish your mom always cooked that you wished she wouldn't. What did it look like, smell like, taste like?" (this is from 642 Things but I thought it was a fun twist on the prompt we used last night).

Post your responses in the comments--sharing work is a great way to discover new and unexpected things about each other!